Turning to philosophy

Lostness  (16)

 

How could anything infinite occur within time? What do we imagine when talking about infinity? Very large amounts are not even close.

Nonsense may feel better than silence: when urged on by our will.

 

Feeling and touch. From a womb-embrace into baby clothes. A baby cries to be held. In stress we may hold ourselves.
I feel my muscles and organs as forms of internal touch. Vibrating eardrums touched by sound.
Feelings coming before language.

 

One effect of philosophy could be that the world does not change but is viewed differently. But my world as experience is changed by perception. Data goes through channels of interpretation, it does not traverse a neutral ocean. Hence experiential relativity: what is seen relies upon who, what, where, when, and how, we are. Seeing depends on the “I”.

 

I imagine our ancestors struggling for morale in the midst of suffering and mystery. Why not make-up some explanations for it all?
Unfounded beliefs may require protection against inconvenient questions. Stories can turn to dogmas. Clashing narratives lead to fights for hegemony.

 

Interactions produce outcomes not predictable from separate examination of the elements involved.

 

Once man can cease battling for survival, he faces the obstacle of himself.

 

                                         

(16/2/1979)

 

 

Poem 1990 (1)

Touch deprivation

 

I lay alone
while daydreams began:
there
seated at some vacant bar
I was soon joined
by an imaginary companion
with a thirst for my secrets.
Her leg touched mine
perhaps accidentally?
Then unmistakable warmth
from a hand on my arm.
Trying not to waver
I continued talking
in imitation of cool
just now
feeling almost alive
until my eyes
opened again
each one
empty as glass.