Fame
when now imagined
strays
from certain wilder dreams
to tamer ones.
In any case
persists.
Just
out
of reach.
Though chances
ebb
my heart still
lacks
self-love
enough
to
stop
that search.
This quiet
craving.
For
some
sense of
full
esteem.
Which never
grew
within.
Fame!
At last. π€©
“Beyond my wildest dreams!!”Β π π
(Well, er, maybe not that far, but…)
Bristol 24/7Β SW England’s biggest independent magazine
published a piece about me, this month:
I promised them to put the link here.
And ask if you lovely people could be kind enough to click it, for a moment?π
That article is the only recognition I have ever had, outside of WordPress.
(Given my obscurity, age, and poor health: it might remain singular.)
The feature contains biographical information, plus artwork and photography.
I don’t enjoy self-promotion. Yet, perhaps, you will forgive me, on such an occasion?
So, please, take a look, if you can.
Did you like any of the images?
I hope you found it of some interest?
Comments are always VERY welcome!π€π»π
Thank you
for reading.
(PS: Any art, or photography, on the blog is mine.)
( art / blog / blogging / depression / drawing /Β fame / life / mental health / photography / poem / poems / poetry / reading / thoughts / writing )
Thank you for sharing the article, Ken – I was deeply moved by your story. I hope youβve been able to find solace in your wonderful art and poetry, and I hope you feel less isolated being part of this community.
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Thank you, Ingrid!
I have been getting many more valued comments, like yours, recently.
Which has improved my whole experience of being on WordPress.π
(I used to go weeks without any at all, and still felt rather isolated through my first three years of blogging.)
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I think you’re right that with the coronavirus lockdown people have had a lot more time to reflect on their lives and perhaps appreciate that some people have to struggle with illness and isolation every single day.
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tweeted the article here for others to read!
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Thank you, Susanna! π
Very kind of you.
Must confess I’ve never been on Twitter, so I don’t really understand how things work, there.
To be honest, WordPress is the only site I know.
(And I’m not very tech-savvy about it here, either! LOL!)
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no problem! keep up the great work!…
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Alas, an artist’s bane to feel a sense of guilt about something so well deserved. I enjoyed the article immensely. Although new to your life and poetry, I am now “caught up”.
Nick
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Thanks, Nick!
I’m very pleased you enjoyed it.π
(And hoping you will return, for future posts.π)
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Ken. Sorrento Therapeutics has developed a Cytokine production inhibitor, Abivertinib, which is in phase 2 trial on humans in ICU with Covid-19. Any possibility such a drug would be of benefit to you? Nick
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Thanks Nick!
I’ll check it out.
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Woohoo! Fuck yea man! Congratulations! Your essence, art, and writing will always go on forever!
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Thank you, Moises!
I hope you are right.π
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Every action, whether thought, emotion, or deed, has a butterfly effect on the world. That is how I see thingsπ€
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Dear Ken, your thoughts, poetry and artwork have made a significant impact on me personally, i visited the site and it is an outstanding piece. Once again your youthful artwork still shines. Also the fact that you reached out to me when i was absent just shows the truth of your intelligence and compassion through self knowledge in adversity. Truly appreciate your work, you, and send positive thought to you and yours. Peace and love from australia mate.
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Thank you, Gary!
I’m deeply grateful for all the support you have given me.π
(π¬π§ π€π¦πΊ)
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Thank you for sharing! Your story really got to me and I at the same time I am glad you can find a place by blogging.
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Thank you, Ulle!
I’m glad you read my story.π
(I hope blogging will also be a positive thing in your life.)
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That’s a great article about you, thanks for sharing it. Sounds like you’ve been through quite a lot. It is a bizarre thing to be connecting with people online, people from around the world, people you leap out of nowhere whom you have never met, while your actual next door neighbors may be complete strangers. The internet is a funny thing. I wish for you continued motivation and creativity. I liked the photo of you with your guitar. I just bought myself a guitar and now just hope to maintain enough motivation to learn to play it half-way decently!
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Thank you, Lizzie!
Nice to hear you found the article of interest.π
I enjoy connecting with people around the world.
(To be honest, some neighbours are worse than strangers: they actually hate me! LOL!)
Hope the guitar playing goes well. πΈ
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I love the title, “blogging against oblivion”. To quote you from the article:”if youβve got an illness thatβs the first thing people learn about you” – but from reading your blog (albeit as only a recent wordpress blogger and reader) the first thing I learnt about you was that you’re a talented writer, and can be very funny. Now I also know what a good artist you are!
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Thank you, Kate!
The title was mine, though, please note, I didn’t write the article. π
(Reading about yourself in a magazine is quite strange, the first time.
For example: I have no recollection of saying those words.
(Which also don’t make proper grammatical sense, in the sentence, as printed).
However, I thought it best not to “make a fuss” over any corrections.
If I’d been allowed to write it myself, that line would be deleted.
Thus the “quote” is not actually what I meant to say, at all.
But, hey: we can’t control the outcome completely, after the media phones us up! LOL!)
Thank you, again, for your kind words about my art and writing!π
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Great job!! That really is an impressive accomplishment!
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Thanks!
How lovely to hear from you again, Larisa!π
(I’ve missed you!)
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Thank you Ken! I have been making an effort to write again and even posted a poem recently onto my blog. Slowly, but surely…
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Yes: I already liked that one, and was pleased to see it arrive on my reader. π
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That is so sweet of you, thank you!
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That’s OK, Larisa!
(Don’t tell anyone, but I’m a sweet kinda guy, behind my tough facade! LOL!π)
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Ken, what can I say?
Man, that is a great article! It must have been a really good interview to get down to the nuts and bolts in that way. Would it be justified to say that the writer (forgive me I didnβt note the name) has portrayed you exactly as you are? You come across totally in the same vein as your site. Fascinating biography and I think youβd be a brilliant guest speaker for any association raising awareness of M.E. Even if done by Skype. Your poetry… love Fame! … is provoking, and your artwork ethereal. The abstract published in the piece is particularly poignant… diffuse gaseous energy, trapped within the rigidity of a square, somewhere in within a void… no wonder, in my opinion, that it was created after your condition grasped hold.
π bow to you my friend. Namaste πΈ
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Thank you, for this great comment, Soulsoother!
I had almost completed my reply, only to have a computer glitch delete it, at the last moment…π§!
So, please accept my apologies, for now, but I shall get back to you when I have more time.
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Bless you, thatβs a real bitch! I know the feeling… lost an hour of typing this morning, a long and boring story… but I look forward to hearing what youβve got to say. No rush… Boris hasnβt yet put us all out to fry! π€
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Thank you, again, for this excellent comment!π
Actually, there were several phone calls and e-mails leading up to it, but I wasn’t allowed to see the article before publication.
Didn’t want to be too fussy, afterwards (as I usually get with my own posts! LOL!), though I’d change a few things.
Overall, I was really grateful for the exposure.
I am, also, very pleased by your kind words, and interesting observations, about my work.π
(Sorry for the delayed response: I was offline for 2 days.)
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Hi Ken. Wishing you well. Your art is full of life….colour and variations galore – a super nova of the human spirit coming from an unimaginable void, heavy gravity. Thank you for sharing your story.
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Thank you!
That’s a great description, you have given!
And I’m very glad you liked it.π
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That was a great article, but I’m so sorry for your situation. I’m glad you’ve found solace in your blog and art, and you’re right about those being legacies.
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Thank you, Ann!
So good to hear from you, and that you liked the article.π
Please accept my apology for the delayed response:
I’ve been offline since Tuesday morning (with no mobile).
Just found your comment, a few moments ago.
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Oh, don’t apologize! We all just answer comments when we see them and when we have time. Sometimes I find comments in my spam folder that have been there for quite a long time, and other times, I’m like you and go a while before I have time to check my blog. It’s fine!
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OK Ann! π
(To be honest, I still feel a bit inadequate, compared with more popular bloggers, like yourself,
and probably worry too much about trying to look efficient.)
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I love reading your prose:-) I know how you feel in the inadeqaute stakes lol, but take heart from all the loveliness that people share here. I think that if you are bold enough to share your ideas and work that is fantastic !
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Thank you for those kind words, Elaine! π
(I hope you will drop by again.π)
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Hey ! I recently discovered your blog and also read this article attached to it. And I just wanted to tell you, honestly you are such an inspiration. Your poems (which I am yet to finish reading all of them) are poignant and deep, they are truly so raw and original that it makes a connection with anyone who reads it. Thank you so much for sharing your art.
I am slowly going to read all of your masterpieces. Please keep posting so that fellow travelers find hope and solace in your poetry.
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Thank you, so much!
I love your poetry. (And followed you straight away, seeing its quality.)β¨
Have liked every single thing of yours I read.
Also look forward to reading more.
Great to have you visit my blog! π
(PS: WordPress hid your comment in the spam, thus I only just found it. I don’t know why the computer does that?π)
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Thank you so much for reading my poems. I don’t use my blog much though. I post my stuff on Wattpad. Maybe you should try posting there too. It’s a nice platform and is solely for readers. And you have an option of posting your art too along with your poems. I am sure if you do people will love your art and poetry. Sorry for making a suggestion I just thought you will flourish on a more than one platform and your work will get the love and recognition it deserves. Thank you again for reading my poems. I am glad you liked themππ
And I will surely be a regular visitor to your blog ! π
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It’s my pleasure, reading your poems!π
Thank you for the suggestion: I don’t know much about Wattpad, though I’d really LIKE to be on other platforms
or social media (and perhaps gain a bigger audience?).
But the main problem is my illness.
You see, I have so little energy in my body that it has been a struggle just keeping this one blog going.
Many times I have almost given up.
Now I only post a few Sundays per month, because even once a week feels too much.
If I was well enough, it would be exciting to post in more places.
(Which is why I’m very happy for people to share my work: as I can’t truly promote it a lot, myself.)
And I shall look forward to you dropping by, again.π
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Ohh…Okay…I will share your blog on my social media accounts. And tell them to visit it. I am sure your blog is so amazing that once anyone visits, they would fall in love. πβ¨
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Thank you!
How very kind! π
Please feel free, if you would like to share anything.
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Ken, aloha, I am very sorry to hear of your health difficulties. Sending you good energy and sunshine from Hawai’i. Sometimes the world does indeed seem small. My sister lives in Weston-super-Mare, and I have spent a lot of time both at the Bristol Airport, and at the main bus terminal in particular. I’ve yet to play that piano at the bus terminal, but I may jump on it and give it a shot next time — if we’re ever able to travel again. Hang in there and stay at the art. Art keeps us going. Aloha, Lanning
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Thank you, Lanning!
Good to hear from you.π
Haven’t been to Weston for many years: used to love it, when I was a child.
(Still remember the old pier, and the crazy house, with its distorting mirrors, etc.)
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Sometimes, we do need someone else to push us in the correct direction. We see that path before us, though cannot make the movement to take the first step.
I’ve never believed that a person has succeeded in doing anything, on their own. There’s always hope in this world. One merely needs to find it, and be brave in doing so. I believe any suffering individual should know that they are most certainly not alone, with it. Others suffer just as much.
I hope you find your peace, dear blogger.
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Thank you!π
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Hi, glad to have read the article about you. I wondered who you are since you’ve been checking out my blog. thanks and I hope everything is good with you.
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Thank you for reading about me, Jan!π
I enjoyed viewing your site and artwork.β¨
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Nice blog
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Thank you, Saania!β¨
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My pleasure, followed you!
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Hi Ken, just read your Bristol link thing.
Spooky similarities in my own life, overnight viral illness exactly as you describe, ten years lost, three years I have almost no memory of, so painful, nowhere near as debilitating now, I present pretty normal. That’s good, I pretend I’m not sick. But I too have lived in isolation for what seems like ever. The new normal is my has always been normal since 1993.
Doctors just make guesses but say: no idea what that is, odd isn’t it? I can never remember what they say anyway. I’m told that’s a condition ‘dissociation’. Oblivion? Spooky again! I owned a boat called that in my teens.
But we all just live in our own way. I’ve just discovered blogging two weeks ago, so much enjoyment.
Stay well as you can. Be deliberately happy. Cheers. Maxine.
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Thanks Max!
Good to hear from you! π
I struggle to look “normal”, but it’s all just a front, really.
(And means I get no help, whatsoever.)
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Sometimes I think most lives are just a front, so we have lots of company.
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Good for you! You make great use of spacing in your poetry.
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Thank you, Lee!π
Yes: I use space to try and indicate how the poem sounds in my mind.
With luck it may pace the reader’s eye, a little, toward such internal rhythms.
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It is very effective, especially for visual learners.
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That’s good to know!
I try to avoid the “cram-blocks-of-text-together-minimally-punctuated” approach. LOL! π
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Amazing thoughts! Itβs always such a longing to feel included and loved. You put this into words beautifully. Great workπ
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Thank you, Josh!π
I’m glad you liked it.
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Amazing π
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Thank you, Subrata! π
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This is so well expressed!!
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Thank you, Nawazish!
I’m pleased you think so.π
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The pleasure is all mine, sir!!
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I hope you will visit again! π
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Definitely!!π€π€
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This was a great article! I hope you can be proud of yourself too! You deserve it!
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Thank you for reading it, Ashley!
I appreciate your kindness.π
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Very different to mine, but really enjoy your use of a page, and use of the different art. Congrats.
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Thanks, Jim!
Nice to hear from you. π
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Hello Ken. Your poetry, as always, is relatable and insightful. Read the article as well. I just want you to know that as much as this blog and the interactions over here matter to you, there are many people, including myself, who find solace in your art, your stories, your honestly and vulnerability, and for that I would like to THANK YOU. I am new to the blog, but you radiate warmth interacting with readers, and thus I have felt immediately at home.
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I am grateful for your kind words, Sana! π
Thank you for reading the article about me.π
It is always good to know someone has found my work worthwhile.
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You are welcome π
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I’ve read the article and enjoyed it very much.
Your works are so beautiful: congratulations on all your remarkable accomplishment!
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Thanks, Luisa!
I’m glad you enjoyed my art.π
(And hoping you’ll drop by, again. π)
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With pleasure!π€π€π€
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Hi Ken,
I think that your artwork is fascinating especially the smaller scattered ones with the tiny stick figure people doing all sorts of things – they are like the shorthand used for yoga positions or like hieroglyphs – AND they are in direct contrast to your very sad poetry! Your drawings have life, energy and make me want to see more of them, I have spent some time now going back and forth to find them – so why don’t you make a whole page of them and keep that going – please? The ones that look like 1960’s pop posters have a fascinating maze – like structures and your colours are all rainbow colours. I am designer/drawer/stitcher with a love of poetry and I would really like to see more of your art works on this blog.
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Thank you, Janet! π
Most of my art was done when I was a fit teenager.
But I went down with M.E. in 1987.
I have felt too unwell for making artwork for the last 30 years.
Since only a limited amount of images remain, I’ve been using them one at a time.
Art and music seem beyond me now.
But words still come. (And a lot of sadness.)
So I began this blog as a memorial to my lost life.
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I only discovered your latest post by accident this week, I have just started to go back through some of your previous posts and this is only the second one I have read. I hope the article helps promote your work, it gives an added insight and understanding into the meaning behind your words. Iβm so glad you are motivated to continue. You just motivated me to seize the day! Best wishes.
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Thank you, Tone!
It’s always nice to hear a fellow blogger finds something positive in my work.π
(Sorry for the delayed reply to this comment.)
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No worries, life’s more important than blogging π
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Mr. Hallett! I’m Ajanta, I loved the article about you! I regret not following your blog earlier, but I hope you’ll forgive me, as I am a dodo on most days. π
I do have one question though, if I may take the liberty to ask… why is it so important to be remembered by those you’re anyway going to leave behind? Why, precisely, do you want to be remembered?
*Sorry, those are two questions! π€
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Great poem! Thank you for sharing your work and your story. Both are thought provoking. Thanks for being a light in the world.
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My thanks to you, for those very kind words, Bob!π
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Brilliant. It really moved me. I’m grateful that I’ve found you. Looking forward to more of your thoughts. Hope you have a nice week, Sir.
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Thanks, AJ!π
I’m also grateful you’ve found my blog.
(Hope you will visit again.π)
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Just visiting your blog newly. You write so well!.. and the art works are so beautiful. I read the Bristol article, and I’m glad you are a living legend. Stay strong!
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Thanks, Morayo!
Very nice of you to read the article.
I’m hardly a legend, though, LOL! π
(WordPress hid your comment in the spam, so I only just found it.)
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Thanks for visiting my site, earlier, Ken. I’ve just read that article, a moving history, you’re on a tough road and i’m glad you’re able to make contacts through the bloggosphere. I like the pared-down poetry you write, there is space between the lines in which to form impressions, associations, memories, to muster experiences and construct meanings, discover truths..
Your artworks are intriguing too, good that you are still able to share your works from youth. Nothing of mine remains now, for a lot of reasons including a decision I took at a transition point to burn a batch of early drawings and paintings; a way of letting go of stuff that was unhelpful baggage, I have no regrets about that. Now that I think about it, in relation to the title of your blog, a partial acceptance of oblivion… hmm, interesting..
Back in the Lockdown time, when I was mostly still working, initially at home (which I enjoyed) then progressively back at the school, I submitted works to 3 of 4 issues of Quarantzine. These were photos with words, something i’ve enjoyed doing now and then in Photoshop and GIMP (free open source image editing) but have never thought of putting together more seriously… I am reconsidering that. I don’t think I’ve put them in my gallery pages yet, though I intend to in due course. There is a lot of amazing work by many others in isolation to varying degrees around the world so I recommend looking it up.
Very best wishes with your blogging, I shall follow with interest, albeit sporadically as life is very busy and I catch up on blogs only now and then.
Chris
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Thank you for this generous, informative, comment, Chris!π
You mention being busy, and I must say, after going through your About page:
I was VERY impressed by all those interests and activities.
To also manage blogging, as well as everything else, seems doubly impressive.
So I salute you. π
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Congratulations on the article! You know, sometimes I think fame is over-rated. Though I understand the self-critic, don’t we all house that one inside. Truth be told, making comparisons with others is a no-win situation. For there will always be others who we see as ‘better’ and others we see as ‘not as good’ as us. Bottom line, getting up every day, putting one foot in front of the other, sharing our vulnerabilities and being open and honest with grace is the most commendable thing we can do for ourself and for others. Keep on keeping on and don’t worry about how many see your work. It is out there and those who need to read it will find there way to your blog. Trust in that. Its what I do with mine. Blessings to you Ken.
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Thank you! π
Yes: I agree with most of what you say.
Though it seemed to me that preserving my work, via blogging, was also a caring act.
Arising from a certain protective feeling, toward what are my only offspring.
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I understand, we all want to leave behind a legacy, even if we don’t have children. Be well.
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LOVE the colors you chose for this picture……….they all stand out from each other yet look amazing together.
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Thank you, Wendi! π
That’s an early one from when I was 15 (and still a bit raw).
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that makes it even more impressive!
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I have always dreaded fame. It seems to kill people. I even suspect there is intentionality – there’s no quicker way to douse a creative spirit but keep them in a state of reacting! And yet, I always craved it like a power hungry monster knowing that it will, at least until now, or would, feel like a smothering.
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Spreading light while struggling through our own darkness is the greatest test anyone every faces. You’ve not only passed a test that many fail, from the sounds of that article you’ve continually done so since 1987. Your mental fortitude is a thing of beauty!
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Thanks for your (very) kind words, Antony!π
To be honest, I feel a wreck much of the time, who’s also unsure of his light-spreading ability,
but I do keep struggling on, LOL!
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That was a really nice article about you. Iβm glad to have found you here on WordPress. Your art is fantastic and I like your poetry. I look forward to reading more of your posts. Keep up the good work. We all benefit from having you as part of this community.
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Thank you, Sean! π
I am touched by the kindness of your comment.
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Hello Ken,
i followed the article link, and yours is a very moving story, and hugely impressive of you to use WordPress in such a positive way, combining both art and writing. And being a great one for synchronicities, we’re from Bristol, before we relocated to the wilds of Wales. A lovely city, which we rarely return to now, and I guess is strangely quiet at the moment. I think your writing and experiences will be a great comfort for many in these trying times.
Very best wishes for the best for you in 2021,
Julian
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Thank you, for your very kind comment, Julian! π
And also for taking time to read the article.
Best wishes to you, in 2021.
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Congratulations! Like the art of Hendrix.
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Thank you, Rebecca! π
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Don’t feel isolated you just made a new friend, hi! Max
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Thank you, Max! π
Please accept my apology for this long-delayed reply, to your generous comment.
I’ve not been on WordPress, much, in recent months.
(Since cancer surgery, writing a novel has taken up most of my attention.)
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