Sulphur shadow

 

 

 

A muffled cry rang out.

His colon issued plaintive sounds.
As if small beings were imprisoned there.

“What sort of person even pities their flatulence?”  he mumbled,
after feeling sympathetic emotional responses.

 

Pressure continued building.
He tried abdomenal relaxation. (Visualising a smooth snake, gently making an exit.)

But the source of disturbance was stubborn. Approaching release several times;
only to shrink back, as might a timid mammal, hiding in its burrow.

 

Then, suddenly, casting off all inhibition with scandalous impudence,
a profound explosion burst forth, echoing around the flat.
Pain sparked across his anus, resembling the cut from a laser blade,
while he jolted upward, spasmodically.

Battling urges to lie down, he resolved on checking potential toxicity levels.

Nothing was detectable.

Suspicious of apparent odourlessness, he quickly leaned back, sniffing over one shoulder…

“Yes!”

Lurking behind him like a sulphurous shadow, hung an invisible gas cloud.
Redolent of warm exhalations from some unseen jungle. Elusive yet corrupt.

 

“Dignity is undermined by our own innards,” he complained.

The powerful blast could also be viewed as a coarse reproach, against absent vigour.

“My farts are more masculine than I am,” he said, ruefully.
“If a blind woman heard one, perhaps she’d mistake me for an alpha male,
and not this feeble weed?”

 

He made efforts to regain composure, hoping the worst had passed.
Beyond that distressed orifice, spread weary emptiness.
Plus primal fear.
Of eventual anal nemesis.

And the road to fartmageddon.

 

 

“A man cannot escape his end. Or his rear end,” he mused.

 

“Ass is destiny.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

---

 

(2003)

 

---

 

 

Hi everyone!

 

Hope you are well?

 

My old prose resisted transitioning to poetry, during rewriting, this time.

Sorry for slightly lowering the tone, but I decided not to exclude an attempt at, ahem, milking a little humour, from the experience of lactose intolerance.

 

(Any art on the blog is mine.)

Comments are VERY welcome!  😀

 

Thank you for reading.

 

 

---

(PS: Next week will be my 200th post.)

 

---

( anxiety / art / blog / blogging / fiction / humor / humour / life / mental health / poetry / reading / thoughts / writing )

Advertisement